[Tainted.DC]

As a child I loved Monopoly, but when people want to play now that I'm older, who the f*ck has time for it unless you don't have a job, a life, or play WoW. ;) Here's Cracked.com's take on it.


Monopoly
In Monopoly, one player lucks into massive financial victory early on and spends the rest of the game slowly grinding everyone else into dust, accusing them of being poor losers when they complain. It's basically Capitalism: The Game--so try not to be the boot next time, Third World!

Even the British royal family refuses to the play the game because it gets "too vicious." That's the actual royal family, selected through generations of breeding and a lifetime's training to smile and wave politely at people, and they can't trust themselves around Monopoly. If you think you're calmer than that you go right ahead.
Game Length
The average length of a family is game is "infinity hours," as shouting and slammed doors aren't recognized as a victory condition by the official rules. We're not saying it's a terminally flawed game with all the time-awareness of a concussed Redwood: Hasbro themselves said that when they added extra rules to the official World Monopoly Championships to end the game inside a human lifespan.



The Free Parking Controversy
The official rules are "Absolutely nothing happens on Free Parking," as even the anti-family campaigners of Parker Brothers couldn't bring themselves to make the game longer. Some people add a cash prize of "all money paid to the bank" for landing on Free Parking, because nothing shortens an agonizingly interminable game like huge cash injections for random players. (Make a bailout joke here if you want.)

Notable Games
Bjorn Halvard Knappskog won over 20-thousand dollars in the 2009 World Monopoly Championships, while specially modified sets contained escape kits for British POWs during World War II. In other words, people need to be offered five-figure sums or held in Nazi prison camps to finish a game of Monopoly.

Idiotic Variants
Bratz Monopoly

An attempt to keep whichever insane perverts that like these slutbabies locked up in their own homes forever.

Beatles Monopoly

There is literally no way to wring more money out of Lennon's corpse without digging the thing up and eBaying bits of it.

Dale Earnhardt Monopoly

Requires a love of NASCAR and an understanding of actually owning property. Target audience of zero.

Batman and Robin Monopoly

Still better than the movie.
Discuss: Any angry results from personal Monopoly experiences? Or stupid versions you've noticed

[SecondLaw_HoS]

As a kid, I would much rather play Monopoly Jr. It was easier for me to understand and was generally shorter than an actual game. This ended when I was old enough to understand chess. The only time I played after that was when I was with my little brother. His interested lasted the first few times around the board.

In hindsight, the entire concept of the game si too long, much like most board games. Think about it:
Boardgames last much longer than people are willing to play. They are essentially the same every time you play, including the same procedures and strategies. They should be a 1 time use game only: Once you figure out that Professor Plum killed Mr Body, the game was completely over, never to be a mystery again.

[Davinci_AMF]

I love this one (tila tequila !)
neway ... I guess it's sad when they attempt to teach us something through this game. Ive in mind the "European Capitals Monopoly"
the "Lord of Ring Monopoly" is a very good version .


. not

[DBD[L]BLING]

I've heard that they are actually going to start making Monopoly without the Monopoly Money, and instead replace it with Cards, like ATM Cards. I agree that this game is too long. If they want to sell more Monopoly games during Christmas... they should run a promotion in which they replace the Monopoly Money, with REAL MONEY, in maybe 1000 Monopoly Sets. It would be pretty cool to open up a Monopoly Game, and find REAL MONEY in there.

Before they do change up Monopoly too much, I'll probably buy one in it's original form, as a collectors item.

[Tainted.DC]

Yes, Monopoly is now changing into a circular board with atm debit cards, a physical little debit machine, and you can now rack up millions instead of thousands. gameplay will change a bit to. Here's a link:
http://www.mirror.co...15875-22018833/